Engaging Presence

By Eva Jones and Calissa 

What does it feel like to truly be present with another being?

Not just physically nearby, but with them. Whether it’s another human or a horse, there’s a noticeable difference when someone is actually there with you. When their attention isn’t drifting ahead, bracing for what’s next, or trying to control the outcome.

This has been a challenge for me to learn and I’m constantly focusing on staying present. My horses have really been my greatest teachers in this endeavor and they have shown me the gifts that come from being in the moment. 

Over the years, I’ve come to understand that presence is not a passive state. It’s not something that simply happens when we slow down. Presence is active. It is engaged. And it requires awareness, openness, and a willingness to surrender.

I didn’t always understand this. I remember standing in the arena, thinking I was calm, thinking I was present, while my horse, Chulita,  stood twenty feet away, completely uninterested in joining me. I kept waiting for her to come closer. She didn’t. It wasn’t until I noticed how much I was waiting that something shifted.

When we are present, we are not rehearsing the future or clinging to expectations. We are not managing the moment or positioning ourselves within it. We are simply here and meeting what is happening as it is. No judgment. No resistance. No hidden agenda.

I call this Engaging Presence.

Engaging Presence is the foundation of every meaningful connection. With ourselves, with others, and especially with horses. It is a way of participating in relationship rather than observing it from a distance. A way of being that invites connection instead of demanding it.

Horses, in particular, are uncompromising teachers of this. They do not respond to what we intend to feel or who we hope to be. They respond to what we are bringing into the moment. And they often teach us through our bodies, our energy, our attention. Presence is not something they tolerate. It is something they require.

And when we meet them there fully, honestly, and without trying to steer the experience, something shifts. Connection becomes available. Communication becomes possible because we’ve arrived.

This is where the work begins.